Gage Roads Atomic Pale Ale

Reasonably priced handcrafted Pale Ales. The curvy brunettes of beer, in my humble opinion. The newest beer that I have sampled is from a Western Australian brewery, Gage Roads. I picked up a sixer of these for a very acceptable sounding $16, under the premise that I was about to willingly unleash Hiroshima on my tastebuds. Branding your Pale Ale, 'Atomic', is really sticking your neck out. Given the competition in this space nowadays, you'd better resemble a great big fuck off diplodocus.

The Atomic Ale pours a darkish orange colour with some slight copper tones. Somewhere in between midlife crisis Brighton mother and Snooki. An attention seeking head of bubbles appears only momentarily before quickly receding back from whence it came, not unlike the career of Chumbawumba. The body and feel is quite light, with a fleeting sting to it's carbonation. The flavours are dark malts and citrus, with the main lives of the party being orange and citrus. The hops are present, but not nearly enough. There's a slight tease, and a moment of allure, but you never quite leave the friendzone.

 In an Australian summer this would be a smashingly drinkable ale. The citrus and the soft biting carbonation would work an absolute treat. However when lining up the 'Atomic' Ale against all the other Pale Ales out there, and in this country in particular, it proves itself to be a beer of Cold War proportions. Chests are puffed, claims are made, but when push comes to shove not a single shot is fired. It's a good beer. This is by no means a negative review. I was just hoping for a little bit more from what I would call an ambitously titled beer. False flags are flown to divert attention, and in this case, the mission was a success. My eye was caught.

6/10

Wingwalker American Pale Ale

After completing the challenge I took a break from tirelessly searching for strange beers, and spent some time just drinking whatever I felt like drinking at the time. Recently though after a trip to Dan Murphy's to pick up some bottles of liquor, I wandered past the beer aisle to see if there was a not-too-expensive six pack of something interesting. I saw a label that I'd never seen before (with a tempting $17 price tag), depicting a dude hanging upside down from an old school plane on some next level aeronautical acrobatics. Somewhat reminiscent of a scene from a Michael Bay movie, had he been born in 1875. It turned out to be a New York brewery called Wingwalker, there were a couple of varieties but I picked up the American Pale Ale. The beer pours as an APA does... but does have a bit of a 'watered down' appearance to it. Without casting too strong a judgement, as some soft looking ales still conceal a weapon in the belt. The appearance is a light copper colour, deep in tone but clear through. The body is also fairly light and spritely, but thirst quenchingly refreshing. The initial flavours are bready and biscuity, with a moderately sweet caramel tone trailed by a soft, but not insignificant, hopped finish. It's all there. All the stock standard elements are present for a run of the mill American Pale Ale. The execution... is not bad, but it's just not at all that exciting. It just doesn't feel sturdy. It's almost like the grade A tools were given to the unlicensed builder. That being said, for an imported $17 Pale Ale six pack it's not that bad of a purchase. American style Pale Ales are right up there amongst my favourite beers, and while this far from being earth shattering, it was a refreshing and affordable drop. 6/10

Mountain Goat Rare Breed IPA

THE LAST BEER!


So here we are... the final beer! It's been a long, arduous, and expensive adventure but I haven't regretted it for a minute. It's broadened my horizons and developed my palette, ruining my perception of mainstream beer, but left me a better man for it. The final beer is a handmade limited run IPA from a local brewery. At $16 a pop I figure I can't go wrong!

The 'Rare Breed' pours a toffee/amber colour with enough haze to rival the LA skyline. A huge, creamy, expansive head explodes to the surface before very slowly beginning it's descent, but never entirely vanishing from sight. Coincidentally, the feel of the beer actually mirrors this perfectly. The texture is surprisingly creamy, and starts with a bang before the tide begins to recede and allows the flavours to shift to the forefront. There is the obvious dominance of hops, but also some vanilla sweetness and tangy fruits. The bitterness is restrained, but this is fine, because the supporting flavours are fantastic. It's still hoppy enough to solidify itself as a strong IPA, but a lot smoother than the majority of other examples of this breed.

I know it was expensive, but really it sits on a whole other level to what most people imagine when they think of 'beer'. Mass production, as it has in near everything, really drains the soul out of beer. Sure, huge vats and monstrous batches lower your 'cost per unit' and allow you to 'maximise profits'... but turning art into a number is a crime in itself. Unless it's forced in to my hand, I won't be going back there. I'm happy to pay a little extra for something made by man, rather than machine. This was a fitting beer to symbolise the biggest learning point of this whole exercise. I'll try and do a wrap up soon, and might even keep doing reviews on new beers I come across down the line. But for now, it's time to close the curtain, but thanks for watching!

9/10

Sierra Nevada 2011 Northern Hemisphere Harvest

2...


This rare character is a 'wet hop ale'. Apparently when the hops are at the peak of their flavour, they are plucked and delivered to Sierra Nevada within 24 hours, and do not go through a drying process. Slightly elevated at 6.7% AHV, and given SV's reputation I am expecting a bone scorching level of bitterness.

The ale pours a cloudy amber/copper colour with a solid, creamy head. The feel is unique and unexpected, like the sound of laughter during a Dane Cook performance, and feels very light and crisp yet still weighted at the same time. Basically, if you are even allergic to hops in the slightest, you will immediately fall into anaphylactic shock by being within earshot of a burp from someone who just drank this beer. The difference is in the 'wet hop' element, the aftertaste is tart and sticky, as well as being triumphantly bitter. It does take some getting used to, but luckily you have the equivalent of 3.8 standard drinks in this one bottle.

It's quite an endeavor just to finish off this bottle. There is a supporting cast of vanilla and malt, but at the end of the day there is one glaring Godzilla taking over the city. Hops. If you think hops are just a preservative and love a nice fizzy lager then you can just fuck right off. It's even at a level above what I can comfortably bear, it's a brilliant beer, but getting through this much of it in one hit is a mission.

8.5/10

Stone Brewing Co Arrogant Bastard Ale

3...

Without wanting to appear lazy, I am just going to take a section of the blurb on this bottle and post it here because it is pure gold.

"This is an aggressive ale. You probably wont like it. It is quite doubtful that you have the taste or sophistication to be able to appreciate an ale of this quality and depth. We would suggest that stick to safer and more familiar territory - maybe something with a multi-million dollar ad campaign aimed at convincing you it's made in a little brewery, or one that implies their tasteless fizzy yellow beer will give you more sex appeal. Perhaps you think multi-million dollar ad campaigns make a beer taste better. Perhaps you're mouthing your words as you read this."

I love it. Without wanting to sound like an arrogant bastard myself, I agree wholeheartedly. I'm no ivory tower dweller though, I'm well aware that I used to be one of those uneducated drones. I still shudder and grimace when I overhear someone talk about how 'amazing' Stella Artois is, or how James Boags is their 'favourite beer'. Not to tactically discredit either, but it's no different than swirling your wine glass around and proclaiming how voluptuous the tannins are in the 2012 Sunnyvale goon bag.

To the beer though, Arrogant Bastard Ale is no Mundine. It backs up it's mouth, and then some. The pour is a unique looking reddish/brown, perhaps due to the oak wood chip aging process. The feel of the beer is warm and deep. The malts are sweet and are underpinned by caramel, with some piney bitterness bursting through and lingering around well after the party has finished. It's a very strong, complex beer and the write up from the brewers is bang on. I would've hated this 2-3 years ago, but right now... I'm loving it.

8.5/10

La Chouffe

4...

And back to Belgium we go. The pompously named La Chouffe is emblazoned with a golden yellow background, and what looks like a Caucasian Papa Smurf stroking his beard contently. It's another blond, and from what I've briefly read a beer with respectable pedigree.

The ale pours a murky peach/amber colour and is far from the sparkling champagne like effect that some other Belgian blonds have. There is a solid bubbling head that fades and leaves a fingernail of residue on the surface. The feel is definitely weighted, and has a brief oily slickness to the body. The flavours are citrusy, with a smooth vanilla/caramel like underbelly. The carbonation is sharp, but in a good way, and the finish is drier than watching a Bill Murray marathon from a sandpaper deckchair.

There is though, something indecipherably odd about this beer which I can't describe. One sip tastes great, then the next average...even though it kind of still tastes the same. It's a pretty complex beer for a blond, and perhaps my still novice taste buds are not yet adapting. I can recommend it as a good drop, not my personal favourite, but we have here an undoubtedly well made beer.


7/10

Hix Pale Ale

5...

After a mission down the street in hotter than expected weather, I staggered back in to the house mumbling "Beer...beer...BEER". Sitting inside of the door of the fridge was a wine bottle sized Pale Ale, screaming out to me like a wounded Banshee. I'd never heard of 'Hix' but according to the bottle they hail from Dromana in Victoria, the home of possibly the most famous seat in all the state. From memory this was a very reasonably priced beer for such a large serving... so while expectations weren't high, in my current dehydrated state I felt like I was still having a punt in the company of Hansie Cronje and Don King. In other words, the odds were on my side.

The ale poured a deep orange with a full creamy head, but still maintained transparency, not unlike a Little Creatures pale ale. Fucking beautiful. So far it was cheap, huge, and looked the goods. I have to admit at first I absolutely smashed it down because I was stinging for a drink of anything, and it tasted like the unquestionable nectar of the gods. Once sufficiently quenched, it was time to slow down and attempt to dissect with more precision. Like a surgeon, or in my case a year 8 science student. The feel is quite light at first but comes through a little harder midway. There is a swirling amalgamated tornado of flavours that vary from caramel through to orangey citrus, with a huge body of hops all the way through from start to finish.

It is perilously easy to drink, and the entire 500mls was gone in a flash. It feels complicated, but unrefined at the same time, yet still very palatable. The fact that I was dying of thirst may well have influenced this experience, but I can only call it as I see it. This is a great American style Pale Ale, at a reasonable price, in a large serving. Tick, tick, tick. Won't take the world by storm, but doesn't need to. I reckon I would grab this again.

8/10